Write about a time you felt let down by someone you used to look up to?.
Think about one time where you’ve felt betrayed. What authority figures (individuals as opposed to institutions) did you respect growing up?. Do you have any other traumatic childhood memories?. In what ways is your life better for it not having worked out?. What event in your life do you wish had a different outcome?. What would you like to say to them? Perhaps write them an unsent letter. How did they comfort you or make it worse?. Do you see any of them within yourself?. What are your parent’s best and worst personality traits?. Has your connection strengthened since you were a child or has it gotten worse?. What is your relationship like with your family?. Outline the memories that stand out the most to you from your younger years. Do you also feel you have these toxic traits too?. How did it make you feel when you realized that your parents weren’t perfect?. What toxic traits have you realized in your parents?. What do you think would have made your childhood better? How do you feel about that?. What makes you feel unsafe? Write about it in detail. What makes you self-conscious around others?. Is it a sign of strength or weakness? Why is this?. What worries you about that relationship now?. See the difference? It’s not that being jealous is abnormal, it’s the shame and constant feeling of it that is what you need to address. 
What you would want to work on is why is it something you feel it so often and why you are ashamed of a normal emotion. While jealousy is a negative emotion, it’s completely normal. The key is that you feel a need to hide them from others in order to survive, or that suppressing them is negatively impacting your life. Your shadow traits can be positive or negative. I even ended up doing stand-up comedy as an adult! This, from someone who used to be terrified to even raise my hand in class! Over time, I became my more bold self again and stopped worrying about everyones opinions. So, I learned to question myself and became shy as well.Īs I became older I realized this insecurity was holding me back and forced myself to do things that scared me- I tried out for solo parts in choir, did quiz competitions in front of hundreds of people, etc. However, my very shy sister was embarrassed and would tell me to be quiet and not speak up. For example, as a child I was actually very confident and assertive. Keep in mind it may not be only bad traits.
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